Twas the Night Before Christmas...at ASN

Santa forgets his speedo...

Twas the night before Christmas, at Adventure Sports dot ca,
And a crowd was there growing, that would not go away.
The divers were waiting with long written lists,
 Of gear they desired held tight in their fists.

 Santa was coming, you see, with his sleigh,
The divers had gathered and waited all day.
Jody tried to convince them, it would do them no good;
“Just buy it from me,” he said, “like a good diver should”.

When Santa arrived, he was mobbed in a second,
“I’m going to get killed!”  Was all that he reckoned.
The divers waved lists for the old elf to see,
And called out to Santa, “Don’t forget about me!”
We want steel tanks, and octos, and Advanced Scuba Courses,
Cameras with housings and multiple air sources!

“Stop!” Santa shouted, he’d had quite enough,
My workshop makes toys, but not any of that stuff!
 “We all can be happy, if you teach me to scuba,
My sleigh on the roof waits to fly us to Cuba.”

The pitter-patter of the divers’ hurrying feet,
Could be heard on the roof without missing a beat.
Aleksandar drove the sleigh, while Santa studied the book,
Jody proctored the exam; that was all that it took.            
The sleigh grew pontoons when they finally arrived,
They all were excited, a place not yet dived.

And without even a speedo (he’d forgotten to take it),
Santa doffed all his clothing, to go diving naked.
The divers were troubled and averted their gaze,
That white, pasty vision would now haunt all their days.

A wonderful dive was enjoyed by them all,
And they came back exhausted, but pleased by the wall.
They saw turtles and sharks and the goliath-est grouper,
Lobsters, and stingrays, and a porpuffian-pooper.

Rob poured the bourbon for all that were finished,
The divers came up as their air was diminished.
They rested and laughed as they recalled all the fun,
While Santa drove back with the rising of the sun.

Returning to Adventure Sports Newmarket, to buy himself gear,
Santa packed up the sleigh, and shook hands with my Dear.
But the old elf could be heard laughing, as he drove out of here,
“What a crazy bunch of divers, and a hell of a year!”

LOL, ok I won't quit my day job, but it was fun to write, and it was written with a spirit of playfulness, thankfulness, and a desire to share and wish all of you a happy and safe Christmas!  From our home to yours, MERRY CHRISTMAS!  :)
Jill Smith